Understand that I did not dig into Paul’s public life. I didn’t read his autobiography. I didn’t read interviews. I didn’t stalk his Facebook. I listened to his music and I talked to him in my head. That’s it. To revisit how we met, click here. Paul was furious one day. He snapped at meContinue reading “I’ve Lost My Damn Mind: Two”
Our 10-year saga began one day in March 2010, if I remember correctly. I studied the picture of a rock band, let’s call it Tinderbox, that my then boyfriend absolutely worshiped. My boyfriend, Thomas, played guitar in a cover band and Tinderbox had a lead singer, we’ll call him Paul Avola, who happened to beContinue reading “I’ve Lost My Damn Mind: One”
I have a black shirt, soft as butter and stretchy, with the super long sleeves that serve as small teddy bears at the ends of my arms. I had lost this shirt at some point Friday night at a weekend festival. I was devastated. Mind you, I had another shirt the same in all waysContinue reading “Brave Demons. Dream Angels.”
COMMUNITY AND CONVERSATION AT THE BRIDGE 1-9-2020 This week’s topic is about raising your vibrations by recognizing spiritually abusive behaviors that denigrate and separate and the spiritually supportive behaviors that affirm and integrate on all levels of existence. Next Step: we plan to include an audio and/or video podcast so that people around theContinue reading “ComCon: Ascension Handout 1-9-20”
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
I’ve only heard two people tell me that I treated them poorly. One was a narcissist. The other was too young to understand how being treated well might appear. No one else, not my family members, my co-workers, or even previous lovers have told me I wasn’t good to them. That many people can’t beContinue reading “i treated you poorly?”
Right now, I am in the throes of that irritable anxiety that makes it impossible to do much of anything. This is the reality of Bipolar II. This is what I have managed to overcome until lately. The irritable anxiety is the worst part for me. I don’t want to do anything. I’m pushing myselfContinue reading “Bipolar Relapse: I hate my job”
OCD is an illness of fear, of an intense desire to feel secure. Because you have experienced some sort of violence, you become susceptible to the condition. It only takes one event. One.
Until it becomes too much to bear. The pain, the suffering, the crushing loneliness all contribute to the eventual, and often unsuccessful, attempt to take one’s own life. We only hear about the successful suicides. The “sudden” suicides.
When Legends Rise April 27, 2018 Spinefarm Records Godsmack has always been the one artist that voiced the feelings that I locked away beneath a smiling façade. As the band grew, my appreciation for their work grew. Until—1000 HP. I called it “canned” Godsmack. I demanded something more, something better, than revisiting a past thatContinue reading “When Legend’s Rise: Godsmack’s Pluto Transit”